3 Uncomfortable Truths About Inner Freedom

 

• “In life, whatever happens — good or bad — we must take full responsibility and accountability for it. Every outcome, every turn, every situation is, in some way, shaped by our own choices — be it through decisions, sacrifices, adjustments, or risks. Even if others were involved, it happened because you allowed it to. So, own it completely. Defend your choices. Be ready to face their consequences with clarity and courage. But never alter your stance or blame others just to fit someone else’s opinion. Stand by your truth — because it’s yours.” — Kesari Babu

• “When you choose someone or something, you have two paths: 1. Choose it and help others around you accept it as you did. 2. Choose it and ignore whether others accept it or not. But in either case, never do it secretly — unless you truly live alone in this world.” — Kesari Babu

• "Your honesty, loyalty, and genuineness often hold no value when others are clouded by negativity — shaped by social media, past experiences, or personal bias. They demand proof for every virtue, but that’s not always possible. So, one must silently carry the burden of being misunderstood." — Kesari Babu 

The modern paradox is a relentless pursuit of external control met with an increasing sense of internal chaos. We strive to manage outcomes and perceptions, only to find ourselves exhausted and powerless. We chase external validation, try to manage others' perceptions, and feel defeated when things don't go according to plan. This constant effort to manage the external world is a futile and draining endeavour.

What if true personal power doesn't come from controlling outcomes, but from embracing a few challenging, counter-intuitive principles? The writings of Kesari Babu offer a profound path toward this kind of inner freedom. His insights strip away comforting illusions and replace them with a framework for living built on radical ownership, transparent integrity, and quiet courage. These ideas are not easy, but they are transformative for anyone seeking to build a life of purpose and clarity.

You aren't a victim of your life; you are a participant in everything you allow.

The first principle is a call for radical responsibility—the mindset of taking full ownership for every outcome in your life, good or bad. This philosophy rejects blame and excuses, suggesting instead that every situation is shaped by our choices, whether through direct decisions, sacrifices, or even our silence.

The most challenging part of this idea is the assertion that even when others are involved, an outcome happens because, on some level, "you allowed it to." This is not about assigning self-blame for another person's wrongdoing. Rather, it is about reclaiming power by shifting your perspective. It challenges you to look past surface-level blame and recognize the silent permissions we often give—when we ignore red flags, fail to draw boundaries, or let fear dictate our choices. Instead of asking, "Why did this happen to me?" the question becomes, "What did I allow?"

The uncomfortable shift here is from seeing life as a series of events that happen to you to seeing it as a reality you actively co-create through consent, silence, or avoidance. It demands you trade the comfort of blaming others for the power of owning your role.

Kesari Babu articulates this starkly:

“Even if others were involved, it happened because you allowed it to. So, own it completely. Defend your choices. Be ready to face their consequences with clarity and courage.”

This shift is profoundly liberating. It reframes consequence as feedback, not failure. It turns the burden of responsibility into a tool for freedom. When you own every aspect of your experience, you reclaim the power to learn, adapt, and grow. In this framework, nothing can truly own you.

Hiding your choices is a form of self-betrayal.

The second truth addresses the ethics of our significant life choices—the ones concerning love, career, and core beliefs. According to Babu, these decisions carry a moral responsibility of transparency. Secrecy in these matters is rarely a neutral act; it often implies fear, shame, or an intent to deceive, all of which corrode trust and integrity.

Once a defining choice is made, there are two potential paths forward. The first is the path of advocacy, where you consciously work to help others understand and accept your decision. The second is the path of autonomy, where you stand by your choice regardless of whether others approve or not.

The uncomfortable shift is from viewing your choices as private, isolated events to seeing them as public statements of integrity. It forces you to abandon the perceived safety of secrecy for the moral clarity of transparency, acknowledging that your decisions ripple through the lives of others.

Crucially, both paths are governed by a single, non-negotiable condition: the choice must not be made or kept in secret.

“But in either case, never do it secretly — unless you truly live alone in this world.”

This mandate is impactful because it acknowledges that our lives are interconnected. Secrecy is corrosive because it implies deceit or fear and, more importantly, denies others the dignity of knowing and adapting to the truth of their shared reality. To act in secret is to deny them respect. To be transparent is an act of courage that honours both our own integrity and the reality of others.

The strongest people are willing to be misunderstood.

The final truth confronts a painful reality of human interaction: your best qualities may go unrecognized or be actively distrusted. Your honesty, loyalty, and genuineness can hold no value to people whose perceptions are clouded by their own negativity, past betrayals, or the personal biases shaped by social media.

When faced with suspicion, our natural instinct is to prove our good intentions. We want to justify ourselves and correct the misunderstanding. However, Babu argues that this is an "exhausting trial of justification." Virtue that is performed for an audience, seeking approval, loses its authenticity.

The uncomfortable shift is moving from an identity that requires external validation to one grounded in internal conviction. It asks you to accept that your character is defined by your actions when no one is watching, not by your ability to win over your sceptics.

"Your honesty, loyalty, and genuineness often hold no value when others are clouded by negativity... They demand proof for every virtue, but that’s not always possible. So, one must silently carry the burden of being misunderstood."

This insight is profoundly counter-intuitive but essential for inner peace. True character is not measured by how many people believe in your goodness, but by your ability to maintain your integrity even when it is unseen, doubted, or dismissed. Peace comes not from convincing the world of your truth, but from the quiet confidence of living it, regardless of the audience.

The common thread connecting these three truths is a deep and unwavering commitment to personal integrity, radical ownership, and quiet courage. These principles are not shortcuts to an easy life; they are foundational pillars for building a life of clarity, purpose, and unshakeable inner freedom. As you reflect on these principles, ask yourself: Which of these truths challenges your current way of living the most, and what is one small step you could take to embrace it?